Should You Accept Imperfect? Perfectionists Please Read On…..

Accepting your imperfections allows you to accept others and form satisfying business and personal relationships with them. This feat of total self-acceptance is hard for many. This task of imperfection acceptance, however, poses exceptional challenge for perfectionists and results in perfectionism causing negative impact on relationships when this acceptance is not in existence.

 By their very nature, perfectionists can be quite judgmental.  They tend to constantly critically evaluate what is going on, noticing every detail and how it can be improved.  They, of course, have the magnifying mirror on themselves and they see the reflection as never quite good enough. Perfectionists are hard on themself and thus, tend to cast these judgments on everyone else as well.  Here’s where the pain or the butt, can come into play.

 An interchangeable word for a perfectionist is overachiever.  As with anything else, awareness and balance of behaviors are elements in channeling optimal results. With channeled behavior, the glass of the perfectionist can be half full rather than the more likely of half filled. While serious intensity can be a characteristic of the perfectionist (overachiever), the upside or half full side of this channeled behavior is illustrated through the makings of Olympic athletes, entrepreneurs challenging status quo, science breakthroughs and so much more.

 In my recent radio show with Dr. Liisa Kyle, we discussed some of the above, as well as a detailed list of patterns of behavior of perfectionists and the underlying factors in perfectionism. We discussed ways to overcome perfectionism and shift from perfect to good enough.  Dr. Kyle used a quote by John Lassiter of Pixar to sums up perfect to good enough: “Films are never done, they are released.” (Ahhhh, after many rereads and tweaks of this blog, I am releasing it!)

 Dr. Liisa and I have a wonderful connection. One of my business and professional  acumens is the importance of relationships and collaboration – Nobody does business or life by themselves!  Through our connecting and collaboration, Liisa created a great offer for my radio show listeners, did some further research  & will now be embarking on writing another book. Woohoo….discussion and inspiration create great things!

 So, if you are stymied on what to blog about, do some of the following:  Engage in stimulating conversation with an individual and really listen (you can’t get new ideas if you are doing the majority of the talking – learn from others), read something stimulating, seek out new experiences, write about insights obtained from a speaker or a forum, think about a past significant conversation that created insights, and start writing.  You will be amazed to see how your blog will develop. Blog, blog, blog.

 To learn more about perfectionism and to get Dr. Liisa’s enhanced value offer – a PDF on perfectionism, listen to “Embracing an Imperfect World”.   This show was done on  5/24/11.

 As an aside, Dr. Liisa Kyle and I are both recovering perfectionists! So, from one recovering perfectionist to others:

 You know you are a recovering perfectionist when you can

 Read your to do list without anxiety – you understand you are an “overachiever” and hone your time prioritization skills;

 Have people over for dinner without the house passing the white glove test (A couple of years ago, we  had people over last minute for Easter without the floors being done or the yard).

 Do social media updates and blogs knowing this is a work in progress (knowing you have pressed the wrong link before or had a typo and can move forward)

 Participate in a hobby or passion without having the element of competition (When I discovered ballroom dancing, it was such a joy & then I thought, oh, I should compete – I made the conscious decision NOT to compete so I could just experience the joy!)

 You accept underachievers as they are (but you do not become business partners with them!)

 You are confident expressing your opinion because it is yours (you don’t have to be an expert in the field, you can just be an expert on what your thoughts are)

 Knowing that you are great just as you are & so are others!

 Do you have something to add to this list?  Love to have your thoughts! 

 

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